Hate That I Love You
by Lucifer89
Summary: Sam had been living in relative peace with her brother Jason after they stumbled across Alexandria, Rick and the others. They had been warned of the Saviours and their leader Negan but hadn't encountered him themselves that was until one day he paid a visit. The moment he locked eyes on Sam her whole world changed including the lengths she would go to protect those she loved.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

Sam had been living in Alexandria for little more than three months. She had arrived there with her older brother Jason after being on their own for six months previously. The group they had been with had been attacked by walkers in the night, although Sam and Jason had wanted to help they knew that the likelihood of them surviving was next to none as the sheer number of walkers that attacked was overwhelming. They had made the painful decision to run, it was about surviving and they weren't going to risk their lives for a pointless cause…that was what Jason had drilled into Sam at the very start of this life.

They couldn't believe their luck when they stumbled across Alexandria, it was a large gated community that was home to no more than fifty people, there were people in their later years and children aged less than two. Both Sam and Jason had jumped straight into helping the community, Jason was ex-military and Sam had been an ER doctor in her local hospital, Rick (the leader of Alexandria) had commented that their skill set was invaluable. Sam remembers Rick commenting that Alexandria was lucky to have them, not the other way around. Whilst the community did have a doctor of sorts they didn't have the same skill set or knowledge that Sam had, she wasn't one to brag but she had been very good at her job before the world went to hell, because of this and her background Rick had made her Alexandria's main doctor. This decision from Rick whilst it made sense, had caused tension with the previous title holder Denise who had been doing her best given the conditions.

The pair of them had settled into their new roles quickly, Sam and Denise had settled their differences, the pair of them now working together as a cohesive team, Sam was teaching Denise new techniques she had honed during her time working in the ER. Jason meanwhile had taken up position as one of Rick's most trusted advisors, he did this alongside Michonne. Sam and Jason had been given their own home within the confines of the settlement, although they had insisted they were happy to share with other people Rick wasn't having any of it, therefore the two of them were living in a spacious four-bedroom detached house.

Sam had thrown herself into her work, luckily a lot of the cases she had been dealing with were simple enough there had been no big injuries which meant she had time to teach Denise. One thing she had noticed was a change in her brother, in the time they had been in Alexandria he had developed a relationship with one of Rick's original group, Rosita. Sam had heard from Denise that Rick hadn't always been a part of Alexandria he and his group had been welcomed in by the previous leader Deanna Monroe, but sadly she had been bitten during an incident and as she was dying she passed power of leadership to him. Sam was happy for her brother, he hadn't experienced much happiness in the time since the outbreak, neither had she. It had been the two of them for so long it was refreshing to interact with others and build relationships, romantic or not.

Admittedly Sam wasn't Rosita's biggest fan, there was air of attitude around her, Sam could've sworn that Rosita had tutted her when she came home one evening and the two of them had been getting hot and heavy on the sofa. For the most part Sam had ignored Rosita's attitude, her brother was happy and that was the main thing.

For Sam this day started off like any other, she had woken at 5am, jumped out of bed and headed for her morning run. This had been something she had always done before the outbreak and something she started doing again since they had been at Alexandria. She always ran with a weapon, although they were in a gated community they had been told of the past attacks where the walls had been breached. After her run she returned home, showered, ate breakfast and headed to one of the homes in Alexandria that had been set up as a clinic.

Nothing had seemed out of the ordinary, that was until Denise came running into the clinic out of breath with a visibly distressed look on her face.

"Everything okay Denise?"

She shook her head.

"He's here, he is actually here."

Sam stood up, brushing past Denise she looked out of the window. One of the first things that she and Jason had been briefed on upon their arrival at Alexandria was the ongoing issues they were having with what could only be described as a "rival" settlement that called themselves "The Sanctuary". The history was long and complicated but it's leader was infamous and had a distinct dislike for Rick which was mutual. They had an arrangement which meant that half of everything Alexandria had belonged to the Sanctuary, once every two weeks a convoy would arrive and take their share back. Denise had mentioned to Sam that on occasion their leader would make an appearance, but in the three months Sam and Jason had been there he had never made an appearance but the stories she had heard about him were monstrous. Looking out the window she saw a figure stood in the distance, his back facing the clinic but she could tell just from that who it was as Denise had described him to her several times…his recognisable baseball bat slung over his shoulder, his red scarf and leather jacket…without a doubt it was Negan.

As Sam was about to turn around and speak to Denise she heard a voice that she didn't recognise. His.

"We have to go outside…he does this."

Sam turned to Denise, she was clearly terrified of the man.

"Why? Do we have to line up or something?"

Denise shook her head.

"We don't have to line up, but he's sure to want to give a speech of some kind…that normally happens when he visits, but he doesn't like to be disrespected."

Sam turned to face the window again, her heart sank when she saw Jason making his way towards Negan alongside Rick and Michonne. As Sam went to open the door she was stopped by the sound of his voice once again.

"Well it's been a long time Rick, I see you've got yourself some new fucking residents…he looks tough, he came with someone didn't he? His sister, who from what I've fucking heard from my guys is a fucking knockout, and a doctor to boot."

Sam froze, how did he know about her, looking out the window once again she saw Jason take a step towards Negan, Rick instinctively stopped him with a hand to his chest and what seemed like a stern word. Negan continued.

"I would listen to Rick if I was you dumbass, he knows what happens to people who step out of fucking line. I want to see this hot doc of yours Rick…go fetch."

By this time Denise had made her way over to Sam's side.

"We need to go out there Sam, it's only going to get worse if we don't."

Sam nodded. Reaching for the handle of the door Sam opened it and stepped outside. The sun was beating down, how he could be wearing a leather jacket baffled her. Her boots crunched on the sound of the gravel outside of the clinic. Jason's eyes darted to Sam, an action which was noticed by Negan.

"Ah, no need to go fetch Rick, looks like she isn't a dumb fuck like you."

Turning around Negan was looking in Sam's direction. This was the first time that she was able to get a good look at the man who had been terrorising Alexandria…he wasn't what she expected. Negan had started making his way towards Sam, Denise was standing in the doorway. As he got closer to her, she was able to see his features better, he had salt and pepper black hair which matched his salt and pepper stubble which framed his face and matched his dark eyes. Sam could feel her stomach flutter, as much as she knew she should hate this man he was completely breath-taking to her.

"Well Simon wasn't fucking lying that's for sure, you're a god-damn motherfucking knockout."

Sam didn't say anything, but her blue eyes were locked with his. A small smile crept along his face as he inched closer to her, the feeling in Sam's stomach intensified. By the time he stopped Negan was centimetres away from her face, his breath on her skin had caused goosebumps to appear and the hairs on the back of her neck to stand on end.

"What a nice reaction, you won't want anyone to know you're wet for me will you?"

Her eyes darted away from his and she took a step back, she needed him to be out of her personal space, but what she couldn't hide was the flushed colour of her cheeks and her reaction to his closeness. Laughing Negan took a step back before turning his attention back to Rick. "

"You're a lucky man Rick to have a fine piece of ass like this here…make the most of it."

He gave Sam another look and she could feel his eyes burning into her skin, she felt exposed even though she was fully clothed. As he looked away and focused his attention back onto Rick and the others, Jason kept his eyes on Sam before he turned and followed behind Rick.

Turning and heading back into the clinic, her safe place she headed into the bathroom. Denise had tried speaking to her but she hadn't heard what was said, her mind was racing why was he having such an effect on her…why did she like it? He was the enemy…she shouldn't be attracted to the enemy. She prayed that all of those people that could see her thought that she was flushing due to embarrassment and not out of enjoyment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

The rest of Negan's visit to Alexandria had been uneventful by his standards according to Denise. Luckily for Sam everyone had been sympathetic towards her and his treatment of her. Rick had been apologetic and Jason had come straight over to the clinic to check on her once the gates had been closed behind Negan and his convoy.

"What did he say to you?"

Sam shook her head, she was busying herself with restocking some of the supplies that had been taken from her shelves.

"It doesn't matter Jase, it's been said and he's gone."

Moving in front of her Jason placed his hands on her shoulders and stared at her. He was tall, but not as tall as Negan who was easily nearly 6ft.

"He isn't going to leave you alone, you know that don't you? He's got his eye on you…we can leave here, just say the word."

Sam looked at him in shock.

"Don't be stupid Jase we're not leaving because he made some suggestive comments towards me and I can't believe you would suggest that either, we have a home here…you have Rosita!"

Jason didn't look away as he spoke again, his eyes serious.

"You're the most important thing in this world to me Sam, I won't let anything happen to you…so if leaving here means keeping you safe then that's what I'm willing to do."

Sam was taken aback, placing a reassuring hand on his she smiled.

"You don't need to worry so much about me Jase, you've taught me so much…I can take care of myself. Besides nothings happened, we don't need to go anywhere, and even if something happens, we're not running away anymore."

It had been a couple of days since Negan's visit to Alexandria, a lot of the furore surrounding it had died down, people had stopped staring at her like she had "target" written on her forehead. Today was one of the days Rick, Jason, Michonne and some of the others would be out scavenging. Although it wasn't usually their role to do so they had some information that they wanted to investigate…or that was what Jason told Sam, she didn't completely believe him she knew that there was more to it but she wasn't going to push him for information as he wouldn't tell her even if she asked. After seeing him off in the morning Sam had headed to the clinic as usual. After making a house call to one of the more elderly residents Sam could hear a commotion by the entrance gate. Making her way over she asked one of the guards what was going on.

"It's Negan, we can see his campervan in the distance…he's not due for another week or so."

Sam climbed one of the makeshift watch towers and looked out towards the distance, there she could see the campervan Negan was known to travel in and a number of other vehicles. Trying not to panic, Sam told the guards to warn Aaron, before Rick had left he had placed Aaron in charge of Alexandria. Moments later a panicked Aaron was racing towards the watch tower, he saw Sam.

"Why did he have to come when Rick isn't here?"

Sam smiled reassuringly at Aaron.

"He probably knows Rick; Jase and the others aren't here…we'll be fine."

Turning to look back into the distance Sam felt her stomach flutter, he was coming back.

About ten minutes after his convoy was first spotted Negan arrived at the gates. Stepping out of his vehicle Negan had the biggest smile on his face when he saw that Sam was part of his welcome.

"My oh my now this is a nice fucking surprise. Part of the welcoming party are we now doll-face?"

Sam didn't say anything but could feel his eyes locked onto her, she felt as though he was undressing her with every second he was looking at her.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you but Rick isn't here."

Aaron had spoken, but Negan didn't even acknowledge him.

"I could make you a very happy woman back at the Sanctuary, all you have to do is say the word."

Sam shook her head.

"No thanks, I'm good."

Negan leaned back, looked Sam up and down all the while he was biting his bottom lip.

"I bet you fucking are."

Sam's cheeks flushed again as she turned her gaze away from him. Aaron spoke again, this time Negan answered.

"Keep your big boy fucking pants on dipshit, I know he's not here, hence why I'm here. I want to be given the grand fucking all access tour…"

Spinning around Negan raised his trademark baseball bat at Sam.

"…and she's going to be my guide."

Not knowing what to say Sam turned to Aaron for support but he had nothing. Not having any other choice Sam fell into step next to Negan as he made his way further into Alexandria. A few silent moments passed, well silent in the sense that Sam didn't say anything, Negan on the other hand was full of conversation.

"Still not speaking to me doll-face? Even after I came all the way here just to see your fine ass again?"

Sam felt her cheeks flush again, he was having an effect on her she regretted. Why did he have to be her type? What was more infuriating for Sam was that she had a feeling he knew what he was doing to her was having the desired effect.

"I highly doubt you came all the way here just to see me…and like Aaron said Rick isn't here and we're not expecting him back until tomorrow morning."

The cheeky smile on Negan's face hadn't disappeared the entire time they had been walking together.

"I know…I'm willing to wait for him. Where do you suggest I stay?"

"You have a campervan, in there would be my suggestion."

Negan roared with laughter.

"You're brave I like it. I'll let that one fucking slide, which one of these places is yours? I think I'd like to stay there for some food."

Sam took a deep breath, as she led Negan up a set of steps onto the porch of the home she shared with Jason, she dreaded to think what he would say if he could see what was happening, and that actually Sam felt a pang of excitement at the thought Negan was going to be in her home. Negan stopped on the porch and turned to the men who had been escorting him and Aaron who had continued to follow behind silently and diligently.

"You can all fucking stay here…me and this caged butterfly are going to have a private fucking chat."

Negan had insisted on a tour of the house, Sam could feel her heart beating fast and loud, she was nervous, he was in her home, he was going to be in her room. As she opened the door and walked in she was glad that it was tidy, but although she was glad she was also chastising herself for wanting to impress him.

"Nice, very fucking nice."

Negan turned to Sam, he started to close the gap between them and stopped when he was inches away from her face.

"You are fucking unbelievable, you make my wives look like trash."

Sam didn't say anything, instead she tried to take a step back from him so that he couldn't hear the sound of her heart racing due to his close proximity, as she took a step back he took one forward.

"Please…don't"

Inching closer he whispered in Sam's ear.

" _Your voice would sound amazing calling my name in pure ecstasy as I make you cum."_

Almost instantly Sam's cheeks flushed crimson red, and before she could stop herself or remind herself who was standing in front of her she raised her hand and slapped Negan across the face. The sound of which echoed in her room. Her heart stopped, Negan raised his hand to his face, touching the now red area of his face, he was still wearing his half smile, but his eyes were serious…almost dark.

"Now that is what I call mighty fucking brave."

Before Sam had time to apologise Negan closed the gap between them and took her lips with his. The feeling of his lips on hers sent shivers down her body, her skin felt like it was on fire just through his touch as he wrapped on arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him, the other caressing her cheek. Sam responded to his touch, she kissed him back, her arms wrapped around her neck and her hands tangled in his hair. She was losing herself in his embrace, he was a good kisser, passionate and lustful. She could tell he wanted her by the bulge that was pressing against her.

Pushing him away from her Sam was breathless, she raised her hand to her mouth her lips were red and swollen, her mind racing…what was she doing. Her eyes darted towards Negan who looked satisfied with their encounter the darkness gone from his eyes.

"My oh fucking my, that was unreal doll-face…"

Sam shook her head, she couldn't shake the feeling of his touch.

"That…that was a mistake, why did you do that?"

Negan straightened out his hair, it was a bit all over the place from where Sam had her hands in there.

"Two reasons, reason one was I wanted to teach you a fucking lesson for slapping me…that was the one and only time that shit is going to fucking fly with me you got that?"

Sam nodded, she'd gotten off lightly by all accounts considering the stories she'd heard.

"…and reason two…I wanted to."

She said nothing as the two of them stood alone in her room. She didn't have the guts to tell him that she wanted him as well. Negan took a step back from Sam, he ran his hand through his hair once again and turned to survey the room.

"I have to say that this is pretty fucking impressive…it doesn't look like you share this room with anybody else? Is there a lucky fuck?"

Sam shook her head, she was still feeling flustered from their kiss moments ago, but Negan, he didn't seed fazed by it.

"No…there isn't anybody."

Negan turned to look at Sam, there is was again a lustful look and what she'd come to know was a trademark of his…a cheeky half smile.

"Glad to fucking hear it, your pussy will belong to me, it's only a matter of time doll-face."

Without saying anything more Negan opened the bedroom door and made his way back down stairs, clearly not interested in seeing anymore of the house. Sam didn't move for a few moments; her heat was still beating fast and her head was spinning. Why was he so intent on breaking her? She was in a dangerous situation, but rather than be repulsed or scared by it, Sam was intrigued and somewhat excited by it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

It didn't take long after Negan left Sam's room for Rick and the others to arrive back. Aaron had clearly been able to get a message to them regarding Negan's unscheduled arrival. When Rick stepped out of his car, Jason and Michonne followed suit as they made their way towards the house Sam and Jason shared. Racing up the steps past the men Negan had travelled with Jason threw open the door to see both Sam and Negan sitting at the dining table…Negan eating a sandwich.

"Well, well, well that didn't take fucking long now did it?"

Negan continued to plough throw the sandwich in front of his as he spoke. Jason's eyes were fixed on Sam, sensing that he wanted reassurance that she was okay Sam offered him a small smile and a slight nod of the head.

"She's fine, I'm not going to damage the goods for fucks sake."

Jason said nothing, Rick took a step forward and engaged in conversation with Negan.

"We weren't expecting you for another week…we don't have enough supplies to share."

Negan didn't say anything at first, he focused on the food in front of him. Once he had finished the final mouthful he turned to Sam and winked as she wiped his hands in the napkin she'd provided.

"No need to shit your pants Ricky, I got what I came for…"

Negan didn't say anything else, but his eyes turned towards Sam. Her cheeks were flushing again, what was he doing? He wasn't going to tell them all what happened? Surely, he wouldn't? Unfortunately, it was suggestive enough for Jason to fly off the handle.

"Jase NO!"

Jason threw himself across the table, pushing Negan off his chair, his fist connecting with Negan's jaw. As Jason threw another punch Negan countered knocking Jason off his balance, by the time Jason went to steady himself and start another attack Rick, Michonne and Sam had intervened. Sam's eyes were wide with shock, she looked at Jason and then at Negan whose lip was cut, blood drops staining the white t-shirt he wore underneath his black leather jacket.

"He didn't do anything Jase, for fucks sake…he was baiting you."

Rick was panicked and so was Michonne, something like this had happened before and they'd lost someone they loved as a consequence of that.

"Negan, please…not again."

Negan didn't say anything instead he wiped the blood from his face and lifted up his "Lucille".

"I'm sorry Rick…did one of your brain-dead goons not just throw themselves across a table and fucking attack me? Clearly what happened last time wasn't enough of an incentive for you mother fucking assholes to behave and have some god damn respect."

Rick shook his head, thinking of ways he could stop the inevitable happening.

"Too late Rick, you need to have more fucking control."

Negan called to his men that had come running into the room guns drawn.

"Bring him outside, I need to show these assholes what happens when someone disrespects me..."

As Negan made his way past Sam, who had tears brimming in her eyes, he stopped and whispered into her ear.

" _You can stop all of this, you can save your brother's life…all you have to do is come with me."_

Sam was panicked, she watched as Negan made his way towards the door, with moments to decide she knew that there was only one option, turning to her brother who was being held by two of Negan's men she smiled through the tears that were staining her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Jase…I love you."

Kissing her brother on his forehead she stood up and positioned herself in front of Negan who was looking at her curiously.

"I'll go with you…I'll go to the Sanctuary, but only if you spare my brother's life and the lives of everyone else here, he's all I have left in this world and I will do whatever I need to protect him."

It was Jason's turn to be shocked, his eyes darting between Sam and Negan, he called after her.

"NO! Sam, what are you doing? Don't do this!"

She looked past Negan and shook her head at Jason.

"This is the only way to keep you alive."

Sam looked back towards Negan who was smiling widely, he'd won.

"I think that's a fair trade, you're a lucky fucker Jason having a sister like Samantha here."

Sam said nothing as Negan placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it tight.

"Go grab some of your things quickly, once you get back we'll be gone...don't keep me waiting."

Sam raced up the stairs, opening the door to her room she grabbed her rucksack and started to fill it with personal possessions, Jason had followed her and was standing in the doorway. She turned to face him when he spoke.

"Sam…"

She walked towards him and slapped him hard, angry tears in her eyes.

"You stupid fucking idiot…why? Why would you do something like that?"

Jason didn't know what to say, he had always been a loose cannon when it came to protecting Sam.

"I'm sorry…I didn't think…"

"That's right you didn't think, I'm not a child anymore Jase, I can take care of myself, nothing happened, he didn't do anything."

Sam turned her back on her brother as she continued to throw clothes and possessions into her bag, before she had time to say anything else to Jason, Negan had grown tired of waiting and had called up to her.

"Time's up doll-face!"

The sound of Negan's voice travelled throughout the house. Sam wrapped her arms around her brother and pulled his tall broad frame into a tight embrace.

"I'm going to be fine. Please don't worry about me."

Jason reciprocated the hug, Sam could feel his embrace tighten, savouring what could be their last moment alone together.

"I'll find a way of bringing us back together, I promise."

Sam smiled as she released her brother.

"I know you will…please be careful and remember that I love you no matter what."

"I love you too."

With that Sam wiped the tears from her eyes and made her way downstairs, past the still shocked expressions of Rick and Michonne and out the door leaving Negan inside with Rick.

"Thanks Rick, always a fucking pleasure."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

Sam's plan was to stay out of trouble at the Sanctuary and make the most of a shitty situation, she knew that Jason and the others were likely going to think of a plan to come and save her no matter how much she'd pleaded with them not to. Negan had mentioned that they'd been without an experienced doctor at the sanctuary for a little while, he didn't go into specifics as to what happened to the previous occupier of the role but it was heavily implied to be gruesome.

Dwight one of Negan's right-hand men had been the one to show Sam to her living quarters, Negan had allocated her one of the nicer rooms, he'd said that the role she was fulfilling was more than enough reason for her to have a nice room, she'd tried to refuse politely but he'd been very insistent. Negan had wanted to show Sam to her room but as they'd arrived within the Sanctuary walls he got called away on business that had seems to rile him.

"Make yourself comfortable, you'll be here a while…"

With that parting statement Dwight closed the door behind him which created as he did so and left Sam alone to take in her new surroundings. The Sanctuary was dark, grey and industrial but somehow the room had been laid out in such a way that it almost looked homely…almost. She placed her bag on the bed and sat down on the bed next to it, her heart ached to know that the chances of her seeing Jason and the others were slim.

Opening up her bag she started to unpack her belongings as Dwight had reminded her she was going to be there awhile. Standing up Sam had her back to the door as she started to rifle through her bag, unpacking her clothes and any personal items she'd brought with her, this included a photograph of her, Jason and their parents which was taken about six months before the outbreak. She stared at it fondly, a feint smile on her face as she recalled the treasured memories that went along with the photo, as she remembered she felt a pain in her chest and tears filled her eyes. She must have been immersed in the memories so deeply that she didn't hear the sound of her door opening.

"Well looky what we have here, felling sentimental doll-face?"

Sam turned to see Negan standing in the doorway, his trademark baseball bat Lucille slung over his shoulder, his gloved hand holding it tightly. Sam wiped her eyes as she faced him.

"Sorry, I didn't hear you knock?"

Negan smiled as her took a step forward into Sam's room, one of the Saviours remained outside the room clearly they were still unsure of Sam and her intentions. This hadn't gone unnoticed by Sam, she looked to the man outside and then to Negan.

"Seriously? You need a chaperone to come see me? You can't honestly think I'm a threat?"

Negan took another step forward, this time you felt the air around him shift.

"Protection from you sugar tits? Don't fucking flatter yourself…"

Sam stood firm, she wasn't intimidated by him, it was still very much the same…she was insanely attracted to him. Taking a deep breath as if to calm himself Negan continued.

"Dammit Samantha you made me lose my trail of thought, I came here to give you the official introduction to the Sanctuary, there are those that work for points, those that become Saviours and live like kings and then there are those lucky lucky ladies that chose to become my wives."

Sam was stood in disbelief, he had said wives…which meant he had more than one?

"You've landed on your feet her Samantha darling, you're a god damn doctor and this 'Sanctuary' sure needs one of them…but if you wanted to take option three, I can be more than accommodating."

Her stomach twisted. The thought of being part of his 'harem' was nauseating to her, not only that but she shouldn't want to want to take the offer and she had found herself contemplating it for a fleeting second.

"Thanks, but no thanks, I'd rather put my skills to good use and not be some pampered piece of pussy that you have your choice of."

Negan feigned a hurt expression, but didn't look angry as he had done previously, Sam would say it was more amused than anything else.

"Hot damn you're a feisty one, I knew the longing in my loins wasn't going to be wrong about you."

Sam felt her cheeks flush as Negan took a step closer to her, inches separating them. She breathed deeply and as she did she she took in his sent which was a mixture of whiskey and cigarettes, it wasn't a smell she disliked, it made her want him more.

"I knew you wouldn't buy option number three but dammit darling I was going to try…you can change your mind at anytime, all you have to do is say the word."

Sam looked at him, still denying the ache she was feeling in her abdomen.

"And like I said, it's not going to happen…this, me being here it's to keep Jason alive and nothing else."

Negan took a step back from Sam, he arched his back every so slightly, he leaned and moved Lucille from his shoulder to his side, his eyes darkened.

"Why Miss Samantha, you've ruined a perfectly pleasant conversation…I'm a man of my word, I won't kill him…but I can't promise anything if he goes and does some dumb ass stupid shit again…"

Leaning towards Sam he raised Lucille in her direction, this was the first time she was able to fully take in the beloved baseball bat, the wood was beginning to stain with blood, the barbed wire damaged. She found herself wondering whether he had to regularly replace the barbed wire after a particularly brutal day?

"…what do you think his chances are for staying out of trouble? Personally, I think they're next to fucking none, I've got his precious baby sister…I don't think he's going to stop until he's got you back and might I add that I think that's pretty fucking stupid."

Sam didn't say anything, mainly because everything he said as probably right. As much as she had asked him to stay away and not try to 'save' her, he was going to try something that much she knew and it broke her heart to think about it. By not saying anything, Sam gave Negan the answer he suspected.

"I thought as much, you've saved him once…I wonder what you'll have to sacrifice when he needs his sorry fucking ass saved again…I wonder what you'll do?"

As he said this he looked Sam up and down, undressing her with his eyes, she felt exposed and her stomach turned, if Jason really did do something stupid and put his life in danger again would she really be able to give herself to Negan and become his wife? The sad thing was she already knew the answer, if it was to save Jason she'd do it without hesitation.

TBC

Negan turned on his heel and exited her room, Sam followed, she thought it better to not antagonise him any further than he already had.

As they made their way down the halls she noticed how eerily dark it was even though it was still light outside. It wasn't long until they were in another room, like hers it had been set up in such a way that it was cosy, there was a large bed in the middle of the room and a sofa to one side. As Sam walked in Negan stood by the door, as he closed the door he ushered the Saviour who had been walking behind him away. Once the door was closed he turne

Settling into Sanctuary life had been relatively quick for Sam, quicker than she'd like to admit.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

Sam had been at the Sanctuary for little more than a week and she hadn't had much interaction with Negan since he left her room on her first night. As she'd suspected she hadn't been able sleep much, if at all since her arrival. Some of the Saviours had been pleasant, the others not so much. Dwight had been indifferent towards her but she put that down to him despising where she was from, but unfortunately for him even he couldn't deny the Sanctuary's need for a properly qualified doctor.

Sitting in the make shift clinic Sam couldn't deny that she had been kept busy, the number of work related injuries ranged from burns from the stoves to bullet wounds received when collections had gone south. In the down time Sam had been taking stock of the supplies, they were very well equipped, she couldn't deny that, some of the things she had access to she hadn't seen since her ER days. It was as she was taking stock that she heard a commotion, two Saviours clamouring through the door, carrying one of their comrades who was screaming in agony.

"What happened?"

Sam cleared one of the beds and the Saviours placed their friend onto the bed, it was then that she was able to see the wound clearly, he'd been bitten on the forearm, his bone and muscle exposed.

"How long ago did this happen?"

One of the Saviours was panicking, he was clearly close to the man on the bed in front of her, but this wasn't the time to be emotional and panic, treating a bite was time sensitive when it was on an area that could be amputated.

"I know this is hard, but I need to know how long ago this happened, it is the difference between whether I try to save him or put him out of his misery and save him from an agonising death."

The Saviour looked to Sam and nodded.

"About five, maybe ten minutes, we were just coming back…"

Sam cut him off.

"I don't need to know details."

Her mind was racing, he was close to the limit, the infection spread fast, anything more than ten minutes and it was futile to attempt anything. Grabbing a tourniquet, she wrapped it around the man's forearm, above the bite. Turning the man on the table, she picked up a cloth and made it into a ball, she put it into the mans mouth and apologised.

"I'm sorry, this is going to hurt like hell."

Sam looked up at the Saviours who had brought him in.

"I need you to hold him down and keep him still."

They both nodded, grabbing the surgical saw she turned it on, taking a deep breath she began the amputation. The moment the saw hit the skin the man screamed out in agony, his friends pinning him down, concern for their friend evident in their eyes. The blood spray was unavoidable, Sam was covered, but the arm was off and the cut had been clean. Sam didn't have time to rest, now the arm was off she knew she needed to stop the bleeding. Grabbing a suturing kit and clamps she started tying off the blood vessels and slowly the bleeding stopped. The man on the table had passed out not long into the procedure, the pain too much to bare. Sam rubbed her forehead with the back of her forearm. She hadn't done an amputation in a while, there hadn't been a need for it at Alexandria.

She checked his pulse and it was strong, she looked up at the two Saviours that had brought him, a somewhat shocked and relieved expression on their faces.

"He's not out of the woods, he's going to need a blood transfusion and antibiotics to fight off any infection…but if he's already infected…then there's nothing more to be done, we should be able to tell in the next couple of hours."

The two men nodded, as Sam turned around she saw Negan standing in the doorway, clapping.

"Wow…now that was some fucking freaky ass shit there."

Shocked Sam was speechless, she hadn't expected him to show up especially now.

"You're thinking 'what is he doing here?' Well darling let me tell you, I wanted to see the dumb shit that got bitten right outside the gates."

Sam frowned.

"I mean, what kind of fuckwit lets themselves get bitten so close to home? I just had to see his sorry excuse for a face…is he going to live?"

She couldn't believe what she was hearing clearly he wasn't as caring as she had been led to believe, or was it only people in his 'inner circle' that he cared about?

"The bleeding's stopped and his temperature is normal…so I'm cautiously optimistic, but from the sounds of it you couldn't care either way."

She should've known by now that backchat wasn't something Negan was a fan of, so why did she keep doing it? Negan smiled, but it wasn't a friendly smile, it was sinister. Taking a step towards Sam he rounded the table, as per usual he was wearing his trademark leather jacket and was carrying Lucille. One thing she hadn't succumbed to yet was kneeling, the two Saviours had fallen to their knees when Negan had made his presence known, as did everyone, not Sam and for some reason he seemed to let it slide, he let a lot of things go which if it had been anyone else they'd be severely punished.

"Watch the way you talk to me Samantha…"

As he leaned in close he whispered only loud enough for her to hear.

"… _I'll only tolerate that shit in private, don't disrespect me when we've got company."_

Sam nodded, her cheeks flushed. She didn't know why but the touch of his breath on her skin always made her forget why. What made it worse is that she was pretty sure he knew it as well. Her eyes locked with his and her breath caught in her throat. Ever since they kissed in her room back at Alexandria she'd been trying to forget but moments like this when he was so close made her want to repeat the experience. He looked to the two Saviours in the room and tilted his head towards the door, getting the message they made their exit swiftly.

"Now we're alone…"

Negan took another step forward but Sam took a step back, she could feel the tension filling the room, the ache in her stomach, yearning for his touch.

"But we're not alone, I need too…"

Sam tried to look towards the man on the table but Negan stopped her with his gloved hand cradling her cheek, which she remembered was covered in blood spray, in fact the whole room smelt of blood and there was a dismembered body part on the floor between them…she didn't want this, at least not like this.

"Please stop…I can't, I won't."

As she asked he stopped, but he didn't remove his hand from her face. His eyes looked into hers.

"Why…I can tell you want this, you've been denying it since you first fucking clocked eyes on me, but that kiss…damn doll that blew my mind."

Sam's eyes searched his, she needed to be stronger, she couldn't deny what he was saying, but he was the enemy and their kiss had been a mistake.

"Please…I can't…I need to focus on him and his recovery, I don't…"

Negan didn't say anything but nodded in acknowledgement.

"I'm not going to force you into anything Samantha, but once this guy is out of the woods and you're cleaned up we need to talk."

Negan left the room, leaving Sam flushed.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six:**

The next day Sam was sitting in the clinic watching over her patient, he had made it through the night and there had been no signs of fever or infection, he had been lucky. As she checked his wound and changed the dressing, Sam thought back to Negan's request that they talk, she had no intention of seeking out Negan. She knew that being in close proximity to him wasn't a place she wanted to be, or at least that's what she needed to keep telling herself. Watching over the injured man in the clinic her mind wandered to thoughts of her brother and what he must be thinking. She knew he would be thinking worst case scenario. As she daydreamed she heard the sound of a knock at the clinic door, stood there was a pretty petite blonde wearing a ridiculously tight black dress that hugged her slender frame in all the right places. The blonde made her way into the room, she grimaced as she saw the man lying on one of the beds.

"Oh my god that's disgusting, he's only got one arm!"

Sam furrowed her brows, standing up she folded her arms across her chest and studied the woman.

"I'm sorry, can I help you?"

The blonde turned her attention to Sam and smiled sickly sweet at her, it was a smile that Sam imagined had men bending to her will.

"I'm here for my monthly check up."

Sam said nothing, she had no idea what this Barbie wanted, and this became evident to the Barbie in question.

"Oh shoot, didn't you get told? All of the wives come for monthly check ups, you know to see whether or not we're pregnant."

Sam's begged her expression not to defy her, nodding she smiled as best she could and motioned towards one of the empty bays, grabbing one of the urine sample cups she handed it to the blonde and smiled once again.

"Thanks, the names Amber by the way."

Sam watched as 'Amber' made her way to the toilet and closed the door. She took a deep breath and rubbed her temples, this was too much. Not only had she been trying to avoid seeing Negan but she definitely didn't want to meet any of his wives, and there way no way she was going to be their personal doctor taking their pregnancy tests. Moments later Amber emerged and handed the sample to Sam who placed one of the pregnancy tests into it.

"Just need to wait a couple of minutes."

Amber nodded.

"I know the drill, I don't feel pregnant but then again you never know."

Sam didn't say anything but nodded in vague agreement, she just wanted this Barbie out of her clinic. Looking at the test after a couple of awkward minutes it was negative, Sam relayed the news to Amber who looked upset by the news. Without saying another word to Sam, she swanned off out of the clinic, Sam was sure was stamping her feet.

Letting her anger and frustration get the better of her Sam snapped the pregnancy test in half and threw it at the wall, along with a coffee cup. As she did so Dwight had appeared at the door.

"Ah, I thought I saw Amber leaving…is that the first one you've met?"

Spinning around Sam could see Dwight leaning against the doorway, she was sure he looked amused.

"You mean Malibu Barbie? I've just had the delight."

Dwight made his way into the room moving so that he was stood opposite Sam.

"Yeah, she's something else isn't she? I'm sorry about that, they have their own doctor to go to for that sort of thing…she came here to mark her territory sort of thing and to get a get a good look at you herself, you've been the talk of the Sanctuary since you came here and you saved Peter's life."

Sam didn't say anything at first, instead she looked towards Peter who was still unconscious, although he looked to be out of the woods his life was going to be different when he woke up, he had been saved from turning but he'd lost his arm in order for that to happen, she wondered how he would react and whether or not he would embrace it or be destroyed by it. Dwight looked over to Sam and could see that she was deep in thought sensing her worry.

"He'll be thankful…I've known Peter for a long time, he's a good guy that was unlucky, he'd rather be alive and have one less arm than dead, you can trust me on that."

Sam smiled at Dwight and thanked him, he wasn't so bad as she first thought.

"Cutting off limbs and saving lives, that's the kind of doctor I am…I will not be belittled and treated as their personal physician…I'm worth more than that."

Dwight nodded in agreement, his arms folded across his chest, his handgun in his holster at his waist.

"I completely agree, as does Negan…he knows what your skills are worth, he won't be impressed that Amber has done this."

Laughing Sam raised her eyebrows, she would like to see the sickly smile wiped off Amber's face by Negan, as she was lost in thoughts of Negan chewing out Amber for wasting Sam's time she noticed the way Dwight was looking at her.

"You look good laughing Sam, it suits you. I know this isn't where you want to be but you should make the most of a bad situation and try to enjoy it…we're not all bad people, we're just in a messed-up situation."

Sam smiled genuinely at Dwight, perhaps for the first time since she had been at the Sanctuary she felt calm and somewhat at ease.

"To be honest Dwight, I didn't think you liked me when I first arrived."

It was Dwight's turn to laugh, Sam studied him curiously she didn't think what she had said had been that amusing.

"It wasn't that I didn't like you, it was more to do with that I couldn't believe how willingly you went along with him, I thought you were going to be another Amber."

Shaking her head Sam scoffed.

"Not likely, give me some credit Dwight…although I can't believe how willingly I cam either but when you're given a choice in order to save your loved ones you do it…no matter how much you don't want to be separated from them. Coming here, leaving with Negan was all to save my brothers life and if I had to do it again I would…in a heartbeat without hesitation…that's love."

Dwight didn't say anything but Sam looked at him cautiously, clearly something Sam had said had struck a chord with him but she wasn't sure what, there were a few silent moments between them before he spoke.

"I know the feeling, my wife Sherry she became on of Negan's wives in order to save my life…we had run away from this place once before and stolen some supplies, when we were caught I was going to get the rough end of Lucille as a punishment but Sherry begged with Negan to spare me…he said the only way that would happen would be if she became his wife which she did…without hesitation, I didn't go unpunished though…"

Dwight gestured to the significant scarring to the side of his face, Sam felt her heart break for him.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know…"

Dwight shrugged his shoulders as he stood upright, unfolding his arms.

"That was a long time ago…I've moved on and so has she. I better be going, you should swing by sometime if you need some sanity in this madhouse."

Sam nodded and smiled, she felt like she and Dwight had turned a corner in their relationship. She watched as he left the room, looking back and smiling at her as he reached the door. Taking a deep breath she turned her attention to the smashed cup that was scattered by the wall and cleaned up, her thoughts focused on Dwight and his sad story and Jason.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

Later that evening Sam was reading in her room, after showering she had grabbed some food quickly from the canteen area before heading back to her room. Although Dwight had encouraged her to interact and mingle she couldn't bring herself to, her run in with Amber and hearing about Dwight's story hadn't left her in the mood to make friends or conversation.

Sam had been lucky enough to get one of the better rooms in the Sanctuary, it had a double bed and a single armchair as well a bookcase filled with a number of books Sam had enjoyed reading previously and never thought she'd get chance to again. She'd picked up one of her favourites and positioned herself on the armchair so she could get herself lost in a world different to the one she was currently in. Just as she had settled into it and had managed a few uninterrupted chapters there was a knock on her door, marking her page and putting it to one side she got up and made her way to the door. Her long chocolate brown hair was still wet and had started to naturally curl into waves and she had slipped on the tank top she wore to bed and a pair of thigh skimming shorts, it was an exceptionally hot time of year. Opening the door, she saw Negan standing before her, even he had bended to the weather and was without his trademark leather jacket, everything else however was still the same. Sam said nothing when she looked at him, what she really wanted to do was slam the door in his face but she knew that wouldn't get her very far, no matter how satisfying it may be. Ultimately she didn't know what to feel, this was the first time she had seen him since Amber had appeared to her and since her conversation with Dwight which didn't show him in the best light.

She could feel Negan looking her up and down taking in her appearance. She didn't waver.

"Hot damn doll-face, now that's a warm welcome."

Sam didn't say anything, instead she continued to look at him, waiting for him to explain the reason for his late-night visit.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?"

Sam shook her head.

"Not really, I was about to go to bed…it's been an interesting day and I'm not in the mood for whatever this is going to be about."

She could see the expression on his face change, for a moment she could swear he looked uncomfortable, a few moments passed before he spoke.

"About that…"

Sam smiled sweetly, a smile that was filled with contempt and Negan knew it.

"You don't need to explain anything to me, I am only here because I have to be and whatever you do isn't any of my business, just like whatever I do isn't any of yours…but what I will say is that in future I won't be attending to Malibu Barbie or anyone else in your sick little harem unless they're practically dying."

Sam went to close the door, but Negan slammed his hand against it stopping her. She looked at his eyes and they were fierce.

"Now that Samantha…was rude, I came here to fucking apologise for Amber's severe lack of judgement but if you carry on this way I might have to go and pay a visit to that beloved brother of yours."

Sam was seething, she couldn't believe that he would use her brother against her in that way. Her eyes didn't move from his, she let go of the door shaking her head.

"Fuck you."

He didn't say anything as he made his way into her room, closing the door behind him. Sam stood on the other side of her room, arms folded across her heaving chest. Negan rested Lucille to one side of the door, as he started to make his way towards her Sam spoke.

"Don't you dare come near me, stay where you are. Whatever you need to say to me you can say it from there."

Negan raised his hands in mock surrender, his eyes were still dark – Sam was sure that there was some sick and twisted part of him that found this whole interaction attractive.

"Amber had no right to come to you and ask you to do what she fucking did…I've reprimanded her for it, that's not what you're here for."

Not saying anything, Sam waited impatiently for him to continue, which he did the whole time his eyes studying her.

"Also, a little birdie has told me that you've been getting cosy with D, not sure how I feel about that fucking pairing if I'm honest."

Sam scoffed.

"It's none of your god-damned business who I speak with…I'm not one of your wives and I never will be."

Negan smiled, he was enjoying this, he took one step forward and then another, Sam wanted to tell him to stop but she couldn't find the words.

"Never say never doll-face, I'm sure there are ways you can be persuaded."

Before Sam could muster the composure to tell him to stop moving Negan was right in front of her, inches away. Sam didn't look up, her eyes stared straight ahead which meant she was able to get a good look at his form underneath his white t-shirt. For the first time since he'd entered the room, the longing for his touch surfaced and she cursed it.

"I won't…it's not going to happen."

She felt his un-gloved hand touch the underside of her chin, the sensation of his skin touching hers sent shivers through her entire body, she craved more and she cursed herself again. Slowly he tilted her face towards his inches separating them. Sam lifted her eyes to his, she remembered the last time they were this close and the passion that followed without realising her eyes were searching his.

"Are you sure about that?"

Moments after he spoke, Negan closed the gap between them capturing her lips with his. Kissing him was wrong, responding to his touch was wrong but Sam couldn't help it, her whole body wanted him no matter how many times her mind told her not to. Instinctively she wrapped her arms around his neck pulling the kiss deeper. Until she regained her composure and pushed him away forcefully. Breathless she stared at him, her cheeks flushed and her chest heaving.

"Why did you do that, stop doing that."

Sam gestured between them.

"It's not fair, I'm so confused I should hate you and I do but…this…"

She looked away from him and Negan didn't say anything more, rather he took a step back from her, allowing some space between them. She could feel the tears start to fill her eyes, looking back at him she thought for a moment she could see confusion too.

"You have all those women fawning over you, you could have any one of them, so why do you keep tormenting me? Am I some sort of conquest? A one up on Rick? To torment Jason?"

Sam could feel the tears start to fall from her eyes and stain her cheeks, Negan raised a hand to her face and wiped them away.

"I can't explain it either, but I promise you this much it has nothing to do with you being a conquest or a one up on Rick…I'm drawn to you."

Shaking her head Sam didn't want to hear it anymore.

"You don't know me…like I don't know you, but one thing that I do know is that you're the bad guy in my story, the reason I'm here is because you threatened to kill my brother just like you did just now. You have a harem of wives you could do this with but you keep coming to me…I won't become one of them so this, whatever it is or was can't happen, it needs to stop."

Negan didn't say anything, it was obvious was that there was a connection, and most certainly an attraction between them that had been there since the first met in Alexandria, but Sam had just spilled out all of her feelings to him, but she was still conflicted.

Dropping his hand away from her cheek, Negan made his way towards the door, picking up Lucille he turned to face Sam once more, her cheeks shining with the trails of her tears.

"This isn't over Samantha, I can promise you that."

Sam said nothing, and unable to look away they shared one last longing look before Negan left the room, closing the door behind him. Falling to the floor she felt empty, she wanted him and she couldn't deny it anymore but she wasn't going to have him. She needed to think of her brother and the others, she needed to remember that he was the big bad in her story and he had multiple women on the go at once. The world had changed but she wasn't going to sacrifice her self-worth for any man, and that included the man her heart was aching for.

TBC


End file.
